Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts

Friday, December 17, 2010

Breaking News: Lashkar-e-Taiba sues Rahul Gandhi over Wikileaks remarks



In what is believed to be world's first case of its kind, Pakistan based terrorist organization Lashkar-e-Toiba has filed a defamation suit against Congress general secretary Rahul Gandhi.

In a press conference organized at Islamabad's posh convention center LeT spokesperson pointed to the recent cable release by Wikileaks in which Rahul Gandhi said in a 'candid chat' to US ambassador that Hindu extremism is a bigger threat to India than LeT.

The spokesperson said that Mr Gandhi has humiliated LeT by ignoring all the meticulously planned terror activities that LeT conducted in India. He said these terrorist incidents have killed hundreds and caused economic losses worth millions. Not only this, LeT has spent a lot in recruiting and training Pakistani and Indian youth for terrorist activities but Mr Gandhi chose to be unmindful of all those efforts, investments and even cooperation from Pakistani establishment.

The spokesperson said Mr Gandhi's comments have not only deeply hurt LeT cadre's morale but also destroyed carefully cultivated image that LeT has gained across the world over the years. He said it is very disturbing to even think that even after dedicating their entire life to destablizing and threatening India their efforts are not being recognized even in India.

When asked how does LeT want to regain the lost reputation, he said they have vowed to relaunch far more deadlier attacks in India so as to raise themselves in the eyes of 'non-believers' like Mr Gandhi.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Election Results: From Millionaires to Slumdogs!

Prakash Karat (CPIM)

'Karat'-and-stick policy didn't work. Hammered in Kerala and sick-led in West Bengal demands are now rising that Karat be 'left' out.







Mayawati (BSP)

Unfortunately you can't have elections as many times as you want, that's the difference between installing-demolishing-reinstalling statues. The only party in the country to contest ALL 543 seats could not even beat Congress in UP!







Lalu Prasad Yadav (RJD) and Ram Vilas Paswan (LJP).

Formed a grand '4th Alliance' with SP (in UP). Lalu played safe and contested from two seats and managed to win one of them. Paswan was not so lucky and lost from Hajipur, a seat from where he had won by a record margin some years ago.

Forget being kingmakers, Paswan is not even an MP, his party LJP stands at nill. And I don't see Lalu being invited to B-schools anymore.




J. Jayalalitha (AIADMK)

Her price for support: suspend DMK Government in Tamilnadu. With DMK's tally a double of AIADMK, her only exploits were flowers from Modi, a day earlier!








Vaiko (MDMK)

It's thumbs DOWN actually to the best spokesman LTTE never had in Sri Lanka. Lost miserably and now planning for the job there but unfortunately his would-be-employers have already shut the shop!








(My questions about post-results scenario: here.)