Thursday, March 27, 2014

This blog just got a new post!

And now I am blank.

As I was trying to recall when was last time I blogged, I realize that I don't even remember how does my blog even look! And there was a time when I blogged quite often, had more than 1 active blogs, used to follow other blogs and commented on them (in more than 140 characters), even attended a blogger meet.

And now I don't even remember what my blog looks like! How did things come to this? I am desperately trying to find the reasons (to be able to put the blame on someone, anyone!)

My last post on this blog was on 27 November 2012. The post on my 'technical' blog was on 30th May 2013. My last tweet was 2 hours ago. The same was probably posted on my Facebook. May be somebody has already 'liked' or 'commented' on it.

Do I blame Twitter or Facebook for being dormant? Yes. Why write a 300 word article keeping language and grammar in mind, wait for comment notification mail, check for the number of hits to see how many people have read it, keep on waiting for comment notification, visit some other blogs and leave comments on them in hope that they return the favor, lose all hope in humanity when they don't, finally get a comment only to find that it reads "Latin ladyboys labyboy pics transvestite sex tgirl freeshemale.cum transexuals movies on Dhoni demands Motera pitch to be laid in every ground of India", kill yourself.

Instead write some witty shit in 140 characters, ignoring any semblance to what may seem like a normal english language sentence, if you can't think of anything yourself or if your wit is limited to 'Kejriwal izz Pakistani Agent. @bdutt #ChorMedia Modi izz Indian patriot. #GayForModi' (ok that last hashtag won't be there, but you get the idea) nick someone else's tweet or Whatsapp message and get instant gratification of getting RTd (Pro Tip: If you want to be RTd by Subramanyam Swami or any of the gazillions of Modi-tards use the tweet given above!)

However if your luck was forged in lead like me, you will not be able to do even that and then Facebook is 'just what the doctor ordered' (this phrase is a creation of Ravi Shastri, see I don't nick things off just like that!) Here the likes and comments are mutually exchanged, as explained to me by my wife!

But then the biggest hurdle is a word that starts with 'pro' and ends with 'ation'. No, I am not talking about procreation. Yeah, I did that once and the result is a little human who has just discovered that there is a power button on laptop which can shutdown everything but somehow it is lesser fun than trying to scratch out the keys on the keyboard. And that trying to wake me up by putting fingers is in my nose is more effective than an alarm clock.
The little human proving that none of my blog posts were eaten by her.

I actually meant Procrastination. They say practice makes a man perfect. You see I have been trying to procrastinate since forever and finally I think I am there!

So if you are reading this (really, you are reading this? yet?) I thank you very much. I hope you will leave a comment or like or RT or whatever it is that Google is forcing us to do these days through Google+. I will see you in another 15 months.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Dhoni demands Motera pitch to be laid in every ground of India

It seems defeating India in India is going to be distant dream for visiting teams now. Captain M S Dhoni believes he has ironed out final crease from his winning plans! He revealed his plans in a press conference yesterday.

Blaming the curator of Wankhede Stadium for 'not understanding his instructions' Dhoni said, "My instructions were to make a pitch that offers turn from first day but was like Motera in all the other aspects. Wankhede pitch was not only turning but also had some pace and bounce which helped English spinners."

In response to questions that now that English batsmen have successfully negated Indian spinners what is his plan for next two tests, Dhoni said, "We have decided to not put our trust in the curators of other venues and  will carry Motera pitch to wherever we play."

When asked how can this be possible, how can a pitch be translocated Dhoni said if trees and houses can be moved then why not a pitch. He asked BCCI to train curators to make pitches like Motera as well translocate them when needed. He said BCCI should negotiate with other boards to allow them to play on the Motera pitch when India tours abroad.

When asked about defeat in what has been named as 'revenge series', Dhoni said, "Let them (English team) come to Motera, we will give them a taste of their own medicine." Gautam Gambheer and Virendar Sehwag seconded this opinion of the captain.

Dhoni stressed on the point that Cricket is not just a game where you need to bat, bowl and field better than your opponent, you also need to make wickets which suit you better than opponent. He said sole reason for Wankhede defeat is that "we missed in the last department".

When scribes pressed on the point that both bowling and batting failed, visibly irritated Dhoni said,"Itna tension lene ki zaroorat nahin hai. Bade bade deshon mein chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rahti hain".

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Is KBC a chat show now?

Like millions of Indians, I too have always liked watching KBC (Even when SRK was hosting it and even though  I hated that 'Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls', the phrase which Indigo's Flight Crew seems to have picked up.) and tried to be on the show (all those SMSs coming to naught!)

For me the star of the show was not Amitabh Bachchan but the content (Senior Bachchan is omnipresent on the TV anyways!). It were the questions. The fun of testing one's own wits against that of the contestant. The thrill of knowing whether the answer was right or wrong. Gloating when it was right and nodding somberly ("Ahh, I was thinking of that one!") when you got it wrong. That was the fun.

In previous season, even though KBC threatened of being an extension of UPA's poverty eradication programs with virtually every episode featuring contestant who seemed to be screened after a look at their bank balance (and perhaps their 'Below Poverty Line' certificate) and being a showcase of their sob stories (I admit, some of the sob stories were touching), the show worked because the content was strong. There was no compromise on quality and quantity of questions.

But this year, the emphasis seems to be on chit-chat of the contestants with Mr. Bachchan. There is so much conversation that there is hardly enough time for questions. We know that contestants want to spend a lot of time with Mr Bachchan and talk to him, pay their (and their family and extended family members' and their locality's) tributes, express their love and admiration and talk about how they are the first person/boy/girl/woman/(any other gender) from their state/district/city/town/village/block/mohalla (thankfully we don't have any foreigners or aliens else we would have 'first person from Bhutan' or 'Neptune') to 'reach this stage', but there is only these many times when one can watch some one gushing over 'Sadi ke Mahanayak' and how they have already won a crore just by meeting him. (Curiously the contestants of 'Ghar Baithe Jeeto Jackpot' on the show give precisely this reason whether they play or don't play for the jackpot question!)

The fact that almost all the contestants seem to be competing with each others in indulging in what can only be called extreme flattery doesn't add to the watchability quotient. Add to this the sob stories which seem to have been concocted just to fill in the template of the show.

In a 90 minute episode of which perhaps 40 minutes (or what seems to be atleast 40 minutes!) are dedicated  to ads. Sony is the only network whose HD channel has as long ad breaks as its SD counterpart and what's worse is that the ad breaks on HD channel show only the trailers of its own now-pretty-much-horrible shows.

Unfortunately KBC-6 has become a two-way chat show questions and answers thrown in, rather than the quiz show it was intended to be. 

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

The Roopkund Conundrum - Part 3

Day 3:
The morning was sunny and therefore warm. And while everyone wore jackets, I could have been mistaken of roaming in New Delhi on an early November morning, due to my attire. I am not new to high altitude and I know that in moutains temperatures change faster than Mamata Banerjee's tempers! It is warm when sunny and cold when cloudy. I was improperly dressed and I had to pay the price later.

The rest point was at Patalnachunia where Maggi was being served. I can swear that there have been few occasions in my life when I faced such a huge dilemma: trek down the hill to savor hot maggi or save energy and time staying on course. The latter option was taken and we continued to walk after eating some of Anupam's snacks, but after a brief hiatus a well deserved tea break was taken at nearby fiber huts. The route to Bhagwabasa seemed to inspired by our guides as the visible path was roughly one third of actual path.

On the way, we saw many villagers scavenging the hill slopes for certain herbs which are reportedly extremely precious in international markets (read China). They seemed to be hung precariously hung on the slopes but were negotating the terrain with ease and expertise! The trek route was no more steeper than some of the earlier routes we had taken, but reduction in oxygen and decreased temperatures made the ascent more difficult.

Bhagwabasa holds religious importance for the people here. Bhagwabasa means 'Lion of Goddess' and the trek route is actually a piligrimage route taken by devotees of Goddess Nanda Devi every 12 years. But the temple here is that of Lord Ganesha whose black statue has earned him a unique name 'Kalua Vinayaka'. The view from Kalua Vinayaka can not be described in words. The snow capped mountains cover entire view in front of eyes, much like IMAX screen. But then whole scenery is monochrome, colors ranging from black to white including multiple shades of gray. There is almost no vegetation and all you can see around is snow or stones. Walking to the camp site involved a little walk in snow, which was in a state between frozen and molten and hence was walkable most of the time.

By the time we reached the camp site, I had caught cold pretty firmly. I could not drink water as the cold water hurt my throat badly and not drinking water pushed me in danger of getting dehydrated and being a victim of AMS. I think it was just Diamox that I didn't catch AMS too.

The camp site had couple of fiber huts and a number of tents strewn among smaller rocks. 10 of us got to stay in one of the fiber huts. In hindsight now I know that I got the worst possible position in that hut. The door opened on me and for neighbors I had Vikrant on my right (nothing wrong with him!) and footwear on my left! More on this later.

The water supply came from melting snow which meant that in the night and early next morning, there was no water! Washing utensils was a punishment and only utensils I used were the steel tumblers meant for tea (which was the only liquid my throat was accepting!). Going to attend nature's calls took much more effort now that even small walk on that amazingly Martian terrain was tiring and secondly because the cold wind pierced the exposed parts of body (you know which parts right?) like a hundred needles!

The next day trek to Roopkund was to start at 4 am and we slept early, or did we?